From street to eat at the Roadkill Cafe

by Eric March on August 7, 2009 at 1:54 pm

(3 votes, average: 5.00 out of 5)

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	App Name:	Roadkill Cafe [Lite]
	Developer:	Atommo	Version:	1.1
	Publisher:	Atommo	Size:	4.7 MB
	Category:	Arcade Games	Price:	$0.99/Free

That there poor possum done got hisself runned over.  Dang shame to just leave him lyin’ there.  We need ta give that critter a proper burial.  In batter, chicken-fried and served with taters ‘n gravy.

Welcome to the Roadkill Cafe, flattest grub this side of the I-540.

Roadkill Cafe puts you in the role of Slim LaChance, the owner of a little shack off the side of a dirt road in a little out-of-the-way spot on the outskirts of the middle of nowhere, and you aim to make a name for yourself and your fine, vulcanized cuisine.  However, for such an obscure spot, there sure is a lot of traffic, and that’s good for business.  Not because it brings the customers, but because it brings the food.  In addition to plenty of traffic, there’s even more wildlife — all kinds of it.  Possum, rabbit, chicken, squirrel, skunk — damn things are everywhere, and cars are constantly running ‘em over.  So why let such a great opportunity go to waste?  Get out your shovel and wheelbarrow and start loadin’ up.  Take your bloody bounty back to the shack and your cook will skin ‘em, pick out the gravel, fry ‘em up and serve ‘em to happy customers — but don’t keep ‘em waiting or they’ll get angry and leave, and that’s not good for business.

As you collect your corpses and deliver them, your stockpile of meat grows — and as customers order up, it shrinks, so you have to keep collecting more to keep the cooler stocked and serving the customers in a timely fashion.  Keep your customers happy, and you’ll earn stars.  Get five stars and you’ll get a favourable review in the local rag, which in turn will allow you to upgrade your digs to a new location and a new building, where you’ll have to keep on scrapin’ ‘em off and servin’ ‘em up to ever more hungry patrons.

Of course, new locations mean busier locations, and not just with the customers.  The roads grow larger and the traffic becomes denser, and soon you’ll be weaving around oncoming vehicles to get at the carcasses and bring ‘em on home before they spoil or get picked clean by scavengers.  And as if that’s not enough, your quarry starts getting larger.  Soon you’ll be encountering bears — big suckers, they are.  They’ll throw you for a look if they get to you, and cars will stop to let it pass if they have time — but they can still get run over good, especially by the truckers, and when that happens you’ll be stocking up on ground ursine chuck.  The rule of thumb is, don’t get hit and don’t get mauled. You only get three lives (but can earn more), so make ‘em count.

Roadkill Cafe features some excellent (and slightly disturbing) graphics throughout, and the sound effects are great — you’ll hear the noises the animals make as you approach them (while they’re still alive, of course), and they all have different sounds, which was a nice touch.  The game has a good sense of humour, too, parroting some of the common (though less offensive) stereotypes of Deliverance-esque Ozark yokels.  The control schemes are great, too; there are three to choose from: Stick, lure, and tilt.  Stick works like a virutal full-screen joystick; Just slide your digit in the direction you want to move.  You don’t even have to lift; it knows where your appendage is and where it’s moving to and will orient your player accordingly.  Lure works the opposite way; you tap where you want your character to go and he’s lured to your finger.  Tilt is what it sounds like; tilt to move.  I found stick works best, too, and its implimentation is spot on.  The fact that you can use any part of the screen instead of a fixed D-pad area really makes all the difference.  In fact, choosing your control method is kind of a mini-game itself: You have to catch the chicken to confirm your selection, which gives you the opportunity to try out the control scheme before starting a game.  It’s a little thing, but a cool thing.

There are two main modes of play here: Cafe, and arcade.  Cafe mode is what I just described; arcade mode has no level progression, you just keep at it for as long as you can.

Now, you might think this is where I wrap things up.  Instead, this is the part where I get to say, “But wait!  There’s more!”  No, the fun and carnage doesn’t stop with servin’ up roadkill stew.  This is the part where we move on to the bonus mini-games that are selectable from the main menu:

- Survivor.  You’re stuck on the road; dodge the cars for as long as you can.

- Vengeance.  Now it’s the chickens who want to make roadkill out of you.  Try and stay away from the growing throng of chickens for as long as possible.  A rhino periodically rampages through the scene and tramples any chickens that get in his way. Try and lead the chickens in front of him to thin the herd and buy you more time — but don’t get caught on his horns yourself.

- Rampage. In this mini-game, you are driving in the traffic now, and you have to dodge traffic for as long as you can, optionally grinding up some roadkill along the way for bonus points.

Every game mode and bonus game has online global leaderboards attached to it, so you can vie for supremacy with everyone else around the world.

Roadkill Cafe was a pleasant surprise.  It’s well made, well presented, has a good sense of humour, and is overall just a thoroughly enjoyable game from all angles.  The main game would have been plenty enough, but the addition of three bonus mini-games really tossed in the kitchen sink here — and the price point of just a dollar makes this a must get.  But if my review hasn’t convinced you — and why the hell hasn’t it? — then go and grab the lite version and give it a try for yourself.

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Posted in Games: Arcade, Paid Apps